Gift Suggest

Every year for many years my husband promised me that he’d take me on a nice romantic vacation and every year I was disappointed. It was always one reason or the other and I slowly turned in to the wife that nags her husband with ‘You never take me anywhere’. The phrase is only as effective as it is annoying.

Last year I threatened to stop cooking breakfast if he didn’t follow through on his promise. I should mention that on an empty stomach my husband is pretty much Superman exposed to kryptonite. He began searching for a good vacation package before Christmas the year before that and by the start of February was looking at a future where he died from hunger at the breakfast table. He couldn’t find anything that fit in his ‘budget’. Frankly since we’ve haven’t had a vacation since forever, I thought the budget should be anywhere between big and unlimited. When he bought me the first valentines chocolate box, I could already sense that there would be no trip for at least three more years. His heart shaped valentines messages were apologetic and appeasing at the same time. I had every and all intention of poisoning him at valentines dinner when out of no where we won a discount trip for two on valentines day in one of the valentines chocolate box he’d bought for me.
We finally had something fit in to our budget and were off for a vacation. I was content to at least be getting out of the house. On Valentines Day I was all ready for a romantic valentines dinner and to receive a romantic gift for Valentines Day from my husband. I mentioned this to him and he gave me a panicked look before grabbing his wallet and running out in his night shirt. At our valentines dinner table, I was suspiciously angry because I knew he’d never thought to buy me a valentines day gift and because he would now give me something dumb he’d bought at the last minute. Valentines dinner went well and to my utter surprise the last minute gift that he’d bought for me was wonderful and romantic.

It was a box of chocolate covered strawberries! I’d seen several of my friends receive these for Valentines Day and had wanted to get one myself. The chocolate strawberries were delicious and fresh and it got my husband off the hook for forgetting to buy me a Valentines Day gift. My vacation was everything I’d hoped for.

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I’ve never been married and frankly I’m still in the ‘Marriage is the end of all freedom’ phase. I only finished college two years ago so it isn’t like I have to worry about ending up old and alone. I enjoyed dating in college so much. I guess there is just a little sort of something special in getting away with a romantic valentines dinner on a frugal budget.

My boyfriend and I often pooled our funds together so we could have one really great valentines day gift for the both of us instead of an ordinary valentines dinner because the roses that he bought for me cost way too much. There was this one time when he found a pizza place that was making heart shaped valentines pizzas and he had one made for both of us. He brought it up to our dorm and we ate in little pink colored kiddy plates. He decorated his room with Christmas lights and heart shaped valentines balloons.

Two years post college and we’re still together but focusing on our careers. That doesn’t stop us from celebrating Valentines Day together. The more fun part is that we’re not on a frugal budget anymore and I can go valentines shopping for real and buy a romantic gift for my boyfriend. My boyfriend still surprises me with great stuff, like last year he bought a box of chocolate covered fruit. He knows how much I like fresh fruit so he wowed me with fruit for Valentines Day. The fruit was so yummy, there were apples and chocolate covered strawberries and nuts and coconut and a little note in it asking me if I’d be his valentine. It was absolutely adorable and romantic. I loved the chocolate strawberries.

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I have all the empathy in the world for my mother-in-law. I know that’s a rather rare thing thanks to the eternal rift that defines the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law relationship. So just to be clear my empathy for her is mostly around Valentines Day.

My father-in-law has a very twisted sense of logic when it comes to getting Valentines Day gifts for his wife. It’s like he has no concept at all of buying romantic gifts for his wife. When I first heard about the dreadful gifts he had given her, I was afraid that his son, my husband, might have inherited the craziness. My mother-in-law once told her husband how much she would love to receive a dozen perfect roses on Valentines Day. He got her a rose bud and mud. It came with a heart shaped valentines note giving instruction on how to plant and care for it and was signed ‘So you have perfect roses everyday’. After this idea bombed, she suggested he buy her fruit for Valentines Day. She’s always been a fan of fresh fruit and what should my father-in-law buy for her but Chap Stick in three different fruit flavors. Honestly, I wonder why they’re still together.

Thankfully my husband is not as crazy as his father. When I ask him for flowers I get flowers and that’s in addition to other smaller romantic gifts for Valentines Day. When I say I want fruit for Valentines day, my husband buys me a box of chocolate dipped fruit. It has all sorts of fruits like apples and bananas and chocolate covered strawberries and has been one of my favorite Valentines Day gifts for a long time. The chocolate strawberries are the best.

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I know that a lot of women evaluate how their boyfriends or husbands feel about them based on the Valentines Day gifts that they receive and I’m guilty of doing it too. I’ve actually made predictions about how a relationship will turn out based on the Valentines Day gifts that a guy’s given. My predictions aren’t just limited to my own relationships; I frequently foretell how my friend’s relationships will turn out judging by the Valentines Day gift they’ve received from their boyfriends or husbands.

What I never really stopped to think was how guys feel since most women don’t really buy romantic gifts for men on Valentines Day. I’m not one of those women but now that I look back on all the valentines day gifts I’ve ever given to a boyfriend I’m pretty sure they didn’t inspire any sort of romantic feelings whatsoever. I always do my valentines shopping online and in my attempt to find a romantic gift for my boyfriend, I look for chocolate gifts for men and the results are never good. I can’t help looking for something in the chocolate category because to me chocolate is the definition of a romantic Valentines Day gift. I’m not the sort of woman who can cook a delicious valentine’s dinner so that leaves me at the mercy of the internet where people try to sell off the dumbest stuff as Valentines day gifts.

Last year I had a real stroke of luck; I found this blog written by a woman who’d been married close to fifteen years suggesting chocolate covered strawberries from Dipped Fruit would make a good Valentines Day gift for men. I wasn’t going to challenge the opinion of a woman who kept such a great relationship going so I took her advice and ordered dipped fruit for my boyfriend. He just loved chocolate strawberries and the best part was there was chocolate in it!

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The Valentine’s Day gifts that stores pile up are completely one sided. There are about a million things to choose from when it comes to finding romantic gifts for your wife or girlfriend but there is absolutely no variety for women who need to buy romantic gifts for men. Last year my husband very nearly forgot about Valentine’s Day. On the morning of February 1st I made heart shaped valentines pancakes and he asked me if I’d bought a new cookie cutter or something.

Long story short we got into a fight about Valentine’s Day, he said it was dumb and that I never really gave him anything on Valentine’s Day. My stand was that it’s not traditional for women to give Valentine’s Day gifts and naturally we started arguing about what was traditional on Valentine’s Day. We only called a truce because if we argued any longer the kids would be late for school. I vowed to myself that I’d get my husband the best Valentine’s Day gift ever just to prove my point. One week later I had no clue as to where I’d ever find romantic gifts for a guy. All the stores were filled with jewelry and Valentines chocolate gifts that were clearly for women.

The stuff at men’s stores would’ve made better birthday gifts than Valentine’s Day gifts. With no inspiration in sight I decided to find some scientific proof online that said women are not supposed to give Valentine’s Day gifts. apart from a few bitter anti-valentine’s day blogs I didn’t find anything that supported my argument, however I did find a really great valentine’s day gift for my husband; a box of dipped fruit. I don’t know why it didn’t occur to me before to get him fruit for Valentine’s Day, probably because I didn’t know about this really great option. I ordered the dipped fruit, a box that had the whole pineapple, orange, chocolate strawberries and apple variety and really surprised my husband who was sure I wouldn’t be able to find any romantic gifts for him. He loved the chocolate covered strawberries.

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Last year I got it in my head that men shouldn’t have to do all the work to create a romantic valentines day. What started it was a fight I’d had with my boyfriend which later turned out to be my fault. I didn’t exactly apologize to him we just made up i.e. I started talking to him again. But I felt guilty and began thinking that all I ever did on valentines day was dress-up and look pretty; so I told my boyfriend that I’d be making all the arrangements for a romantic valentines day.

I think if I’d shot myself in the foot it would’ve had less dire consequences than my idea to plan Valentines dinner and everything. My boyfriend kept offering to take over but I was determined to plan a super romantic valentines dinner or die trying. And on top of all it I had to find a romantic gift for my boyfriend. For the first time since I began dating, I actually fell behind on my Valentines shopping.

The whole valentines dinner plans weren’t going well either, I couldn’t get any reservations at a nice affordable place and as much as I didn’t want to, I ended up cooking Valentines dinner myself. Oh and I couldn’t buy myself any valentines bouquets or heart shaped valentines candy which otherwise my boyfriend would give me at dinner. I was about ready to bail out but my boyfriend had stopped offering to help me so I didn’t have a choice anymore. That was the one time I didn’t get a Valentines Day gift for my boyfriend. On Valentines Day my boyfriend (who knew that I’d had a pretty rough time with all the valentines planning) really out did himself.

He bought me a valentine chocolate box and flowers and a box of dipped fruit which beat all his other gifts by a mile. The dipped fruit was just delicious and it came in pineapples and oranges and chocolate strawberries. The chocolate covered strawberries were so delicious. It made me forget all about how hard it had been to plan the valentines dinner, it was all worth it.

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It doesn’t snow in California and no one ever bothered to tell me. I moved there to live with my grandma who’s sick and all and I figured I’d get to see the sea and just assumed that if it snowed in Chicago, there wasn’t any reason why it shouldn’t snow in California (since they’re both in the same country).

So basically I’m a 28 year old living in California for the past four years waiting for it to snow and the chances are not good. The closest thing that I saw to real snow was on Valentines Day last year. I never really realized how much I complained about the weather until then. My boyfriend gave me a huge snow surprise on valentine day. Winter usually starts off with me whining about the fact that there’s no snow until I drive my sick grandma up the wall.

My boyfriend takes me along when he goes valentines shopping and just asks me to pick whatever I want for a Valentines Day gift. He says it saves him the trouble of scouting out Valentines Day gifts for me himself and guarantees I get what I want. Even though I tag along I still tell him how completely unromantic it is. So last year he said I didn’t have to come and he’d go hunting for romantic gifts for women and I had to like whatever he got. Three days before Valentines Day and I began to think just how awful his gifts could turn out.

On Valentines Day my boyfriend announced that we’d be having dinner in his backyard and even though I smiled and said it was romantic I was thinking ‘Major lame’ in my head. The valentines dinner turned out to be really great. He made it a snow themed thing and rented a snow machine so that when I walked out to the table it was snowing. Even some of the food followed the theme, like the box of chocolate covered strawberries that was covered in coconut. It was so delicious and chocolate strawberries tied in with the theme just perfect! I never knew my boyfriend’s romantic and creative.

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You can always tell if a man has made any effort or put any thought behind the valentine’s Day gift he buys simply by looking at them. A simple rule of thumb is that flowers and Valentine’s Day chocolate mean the guy only remembered it was Valentines Day when he saw the morning paper. And if you receive a home appliance and/or dish washing detergent, it’s likely that your boyfriend/husband was trying to ‘think out side the box’.

I know all this because I’ve received everything from spatulas to fabric softener in eight years of marriage. When ever my husband forgets about Valentines Day I get things like Valentines bouquets or a valentine’s heart box. When he remembers to plan for it, I get things like an all-in-one vegetable shredder XP. Either ways, the chances of me getting a thoughtful romantic Valentines Day gift have been slim for a long time. I kind of thought that it was unfair since I devote hours to my valentines shopping looking for romantic gifts for my husband. I finally broke his habit last year when I threatened his valentine’s day gift would be as good as what he bought for me.

The effect was amazing, he not only began planning in advance for Valentine’s Day, but he also spent hours online searching for unique Valentine’s Day gift ideas. At first I was a bit annoyed with the fact that he was doing it to avoid getting a bad Valentine’s Day gift from me but when he gave me my Valentine’s Day gift, a box of delicious chocolate covered strawberries, I forgot everything. The wonderful box of chocolate strawberries was a superb gift and anyone who heard about it envied me.

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When I was in high school I was the typical giggling girl who went nuts over just about anything. I’d plan weeks in advance for any and all school events and if I didn’t get at least five heart shaped valentines chocolates boxes I would consider my valentines day a complete disaster. The kind of gifts that appealed to my silly sixteen year old mind the most were candy bouquets and just about everything else that was either chocolate or sugar or sugar coated chocolate.

Now that I’m all grown up (and dating a doctor) my crazy addiction to sugar and candy has reduced somewhat but I still wait impatiently for Valentines Day. I don’t expect a whole ton of Valentines Day gifts anymore either; just one really great mind blowing Valentines Day gift and I’m happy. Of course my boyfriend isn’t happy with that, he prefers buying me valentines bouquets or valentines chocolate gifts on and off in the days leading up to Valentines Day so that he’s relieved of the pressure to buy one superb gift that says it all. So we’ve made a little agreement; he takes me out for a nice valentines dinner and gets me flowers and one other gift

The overall effect is he doesn’t have to have to go crazy doing his valentines shopping trying to find a great Valentines Day gift for me. I don’t know why he worries so much; he’s great at picking out romantic gifts for women. Last year he gave me a bouquet of beautiful long stemmed roses and a box of absolutely delicious chocolate covered strawberries.

My mom used to make the chocolate strawberries at home when I was little but these tasted so much better and I was left wondering what brand of chocolate they use. The dipped fruit was so wonderful I would’ve have been happy with just getting fruit for Valentines Day for the rest of my life!

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